'You need a Hobby!"

Because that's exactly what someone wants to hear from their boyfriend ... right?

Not exactly...

Since I was 18 years old I have always had two jobs, school and a job .. or  school and two jobs! never have I really had time for myself.. honestly the idea of getting home from work.. going and relaxing with my dogs while watching a movie.. having the opportunity to get a surprising yet pleasant call from a friend to go out to dinner.. and actually being able to say yes! not having to rush off from one place to another...  It's a heavenly idea.. but nothing I had ever experienced.

Yet when I'm actually presented with the opportunity to have a life, have hobbies.. have friends!! It's almost paralyzing...  I basically don't know how to actually make myself move...  its like my brain is stuck in this constant cycle of do this, go there, don't forget that; that I have literally forgotten how to live! how to enjoy LIFE.  

I have spent the last almost 10 years of my life like this...  and I didn't realize it until my boyfriend not so kindly pointed it out. 

We were fighting the other night, it's quite silly really thinking back, basically he doesn't like seeing me come home upset everyday. (iv'e become overloaded with stress and felt like it was going to explode!) He said that I literally go to work come home and go to sleep. Now hearing that makes my heart ache.. That's not a life. That's when he told me that I needed to get a hobby. That hurt worse than the first comment.

At that time I was mad... really mad. I thought "Wow, this guy has some nerve! He has no idea how hard iv'e worked....." so on and so forth.. words probably not appropriate for this blog.

I saw a sincere look in his face and I knew immediately that he only meant to tell me the truth and that he didn't mean it maliciously. That he had some serious concern for me. Which in turn made me realize how serious this was.

So we continued to talk  and I decided that I needed to do this. Not for him but for me. My health, my sanity. MY LIFE. I needed is back!

Iv'e decided to take my chihuahua's for more walks after work. Continue my charcoal drawings and to teach myself ASL -American Sign Language.

These are only a few things I plan on doing. Now once again to be clear.. I need this.. everyone needs this. To have some sort of outlet, some kind of expression and some means to release stress..  I'm on day two and so far iv'e written here, which believe it ot not is a HUGE stress reliever!

Life is crazy. But from this last fight turned to disagreement to life changing conversation has brought me to see the light.  Just because I have responsibilities doesn't mean I give up on my self growth as a human being. 

That goes for EVERYONE! 

Don't forget to make time for YOU.

Much Love!

Rebecca